Cinderella Complex

The Cinderella Complex is ‘an unconscious desire to be taken care of others’

It was coined in 1989 by Colette Dowling, who wrote a book (pictured above) on the independence of women. Based on the fairy tale Cinderella, the idea is that a woman who is the epitome of femininity and is hardworking, beautiful and intelligent needs the help of another person, usually a man, to change her situation or to do simple actions, in Cinderella’s case, her Prince.

The belief that women need a man to function and are fragile or delicate without one is rooted deep in society. Only a few decades ago, a factor of having femininity was dependency. Though we have come a long way from that, some if not all women (varying degrees) have these ideas that affect the way we speak or act. To an extent, dependency is a terrifying concept. Being helpless, having to rely on another person for emotional, financial support is a daunting prospect to most but exciting for others.

Symptoms are simple enough to spot. Women who exhibit Cinderella Complexes normally have low self esteem and dependency issues, that could stem from over-protective parenting as a child. Another reason is instead of being able to appreciate men in their life healthily, they idolize them to an extent where it is impossible to reach yet they subconsciously settle for a man who fulfils one characteristic, Women could also have been socially humiliated in their formative years and are given validation by a man in their life that they then crave for their admiration.

The conclusion is that due to the lack of women publicly diagnosed with this condition, we cannot see how they act in situations where there is no support for them and they are compelled to complete a task by themselves.